All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
He better not be in your backpack
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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