i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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