Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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