on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
