when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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