she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
