i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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