I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I party with great urgency now.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
