i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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