he thought i was a dude.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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