Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize