the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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