Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
