Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
