White coat. Heels.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
