We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
