I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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