You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
How naked do you want me to be?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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