dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
