wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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