I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
