Me too!
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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