im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
