you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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