You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
