His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
