Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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