a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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