Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
