I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
