So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
