there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
