If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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