Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
