what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
