I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
