shes about as inviting as chlamydia
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize