I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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