i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
