census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
