I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize