Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
