there was a trapeze. enough said
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
