remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
