I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
