Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
