i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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