"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
