I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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