Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Help. Why am I so naked?
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