You can't special order awesome
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize