You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
